Praying Mantis, Praying Mantis, Praying Mantis

Praying Mantis thoughts for Wednesday, August 31, 2005

Pope tells Catholics to multiply (Associate Press)

Pope Benedict XVI told Catholics to have more babies "for the good of society," saying that some countries were being sapped of energy because of low birth rates.

"Having children is a gift that brings life and well-being to society," he told about 15,000 people at his weekly audience in the Vatican, to which he arrived by helicopter from his summer residence southeast of Rome.

He said the decline in the number of births "deprives some nations of freshness and energy and of hopes for the future incarnate in children."

The pope also spoke of "the security, the stability and the force of a numerous family."

Although the Vatican bans all forms of articial contraception, this is widely ignored even in predominantly Catholic countries such as Italy and Spain, which have some of the lowest birth rates in the world.

The pontiff regretted that God is "unhappily often excluded or ignored" in many societies.

"A sound society certainly is born out of the commitment of all of its members, but it also has a need of the blessing and support of God," he said.

praying mantis - Friend - John 15:15 - Call me Amadeo

I heard her say there is only two things worth fighting for: God and your marriage. And right now I am fighting on my knees for those marriages that are in the heat of battle, for those sisters and brothers who are on the edge of ruining a future marriage - one that is to come. I am praying for deliverance, and protection, and for temptation to be delivered - for humility and right perspective.

praying mantis - Friend - John 15:15 - Call me Amadeo

Praying Mantis thoughts for Tuesday, August 30, 2005

The stairs, half lit from the light of the hallway, glowed a grey hairy aura, except where the shadow fell over the lip of each step. He thought it strange that he would never go up them again. He would never climb up those steps and tuck his daughters in, or read another story in the worn pine loft bed of his son. He would never again dry their hair as them came out of the shower-or snuggle with them in their bed. He would not help them clean up their room or spank them for getting out of bed and refusing to go back. The clock pendulum moved in perfect time to his heart, and he was reminded that any life given was a rare gift, and realized that he would have to settle for what he now had. It was not the complete package, the freedom would never be the same. There were consequences to life. Consequences to poor choices. Consequences to accidents. Consequences to taking the smallest things for granted. And as he thought of these things the light changed just a bit on the stairs, and she rounded the corner - hugging him with her side, leaning over a bit saying, "I love you dear," but it sounded tired and laced with a bit of pity, even if it had been genuine, his heart would not accept it.

Accepting what you have become is often the hardest part. Many times the world knows it before even you do. He had seen glimpses of it when he contemplated his own work, how often it was done as fast as possible and only half heartedly. The guilt would settle in but he would try to shove it out of sight and soul, but it remained there, slowly eating his soul out like the slow disease of termites in his wood bones. He could hear her five year old voice calling for water, and he felt the sorrow of being incapable of helping, when months ago he would have been too lazy to help anyways, expecting his wife to do it.

But he wouldn't pity himself, it was of no use. He just looked deep inside at who he was, and felt a bit naked and embarassed, but unable or unwilling to hide it this time. It was what it was. He was confined to the bottom shelf, that was just reality. But in the morning the girls would come down, and hug him, and say, "I love you too daddy," one with her nose wrinkled and the other with her arms open wide, twirling around.

praying mantis - Friend - John 15:15 - Call me Amadeo

i am
rescued in my
emptiness,
full of myself,
and hungry for more-
I see the ugly reflection
of a God made beauty
and remember that what comes out
is far more important then what comes in-
and what has come out has been foul,
and i laugh at my own stupidity,
wrecking spiritual kingdoms
with my hidden ways.

confession making the heart
free once again-
makes one assured
that God can not be mocked,
weeds will show,
weeds will show-
lazy boy,
poor
lazy boy.

is your home crumbling,
is your heart humbling,
are your fingers fumbling
every time you pick up the phone.

when you are a man
you own what you are,
and you smile and take
the consequences---

and you rest in
shelter of His love,
and you rest in the
wonder of you-

and though kingdoms rise
and kingdoms fall
from the sheer face of love
like a fly on the wall
it's no secret

that the world is in darkness tonight,
it's no secret that the stars are falling from the sky-

it's no secret.

praying mantis - Friend - John 15:15 - Call me Amadeo

"Shut Up and Let me Love You," Bono.

This is his rock song translation (if there had actually been one) for "Be Silent and Know that I am God." - said tongue in cheek, sorta.

The Nooma video "lump" talks about guilt and hiding under the covers and father God - pulling them up over us, exposed and how God says:

"There is nothing you could do that would make me love you less."

"There is nothing you could do that would make me love you less."

"There is nothing you could do that would make me love you less."

And there we are, trying to explain away everything with our guilt, and stupidity, and admissions - and he is saying...
Father God is saying...

"Shut up and Let me Love You"

praying mantis - Friend - John 15:15 - Call me Amadeo

My sTranGe Kids

praying mantis - Friend - John 15:15 - Call me Amadeo

Here is the pic of us at 3.6 mile run. Next Stop 6.0 miles.

praying mantis - Friend - John 15:15 - Call me Amadeo

Praying Mantis thoughts for Monday, August 29, 2005

I thing it is funy that I hav my degree in english - yet I never prroofread or use the splling check. It is mostly sad - I go back and read posts and creack up at how bad I am and how I ues wrong versions of words.

I'm s ure it is fun reading to see how many errors I can have in one post- or maybe just annoying,.

praying mantis - Friend - John 15:15 - Call me Amadeo

One of my greatest joys these days (outside of the standard Family, Youth, God) is my time with the Power Ranch Men's group. 4 New friends: Eli, Chad & Ron. I have known Ron in the wee-past - but our times at Native New Yorker have been great. I remember having a dream about a men's group in New York years back, and I remember Paul leading a group of men at the Native New Yorker and how great that was - and how it was right and good - even if it was ended in not the most perfect of ways. But, I admired what he was doing. I remember walking in my neighborhood and how he was talking to everyone trying to reach out - his gift of friendship and Jesus.

Anyways - for once in my neighborhood I have it. Last Saturday, I woke up at 8:30 and started to gather the stuff for Breakfast - I started cooking bacon, eggs, biscuits - and then decided to call my neighbors. We have been in this neighborhood for only 4 months and had 4-5 bra-b-ques with them already - more than all the dinners I have had in my previous 9 years on various neighborhoods. So at 9:15 I called my nieghbors - (non-church folks), and said, "You asleep?" He said groggily, "uh yeah." I said, "Get up, and get over here in 30 minutes, I am feeding you and your wife breakfast," I am sure they thought we were the neighbors from hell - heh!!! Anyways, they came over and I think we had an amazing breakfast - Mandy and I did anyways.

Finally able to live out the command - "Love your neighbor as yourself."

praying mantis - Friend - John 15:15 - Call me Amadeo

Praying Mantis thoughts for Sunday, August 28, 2005

Have you collected a blessing today?

Church felt somuch like family today. Me and my 45 or so kids. We sat around joked, dug in the word, prayed, dialoged about peer pressure and God's love for us. We talked about Bono and Jacob & Esau - and hungering for God's blessings - Bono says - the only way he can explain God loving Jacob and hating Esau was because Jacob was really fighting for God's blessings. Bono talks about how he collects blessings, in his book by Michael Assyacs - Bono on Bono. He says he has collected blessings from Tutu, Billy Graham, the Pope, etc.

How cool to collect blessings. I challenged my youth to get blessings from spiritual leaders in their lives. I said I would give them a ring pop if they collected a blessing from one of our head pastors. Already one guy got a blessing from one of the pastors.

praying mantis - Friend - John 15:15 - Call me Amadeo

Praying Mantis thoughts for Saturday, August 27, 2005

It's horrible really. I've been feeling this pacificist rising up within me over the last year. Over and over again I feel the thoughts rising up in me, and I haven't been able to shake them out or reconcile them to my beliefs that there comes a time to fight, and that there comes a time to kill and a time to die. I'm not writing this to change anyone's mind - just to get it out while the feeling is strong - so bear with me as I tell you the secrets that have been invading my mind over the last few years.

Obviously, we see Jesus who did what he did and took the results of what he did - for love. Yeah he took the whips out in the temple, and bravely spoke harsh...very harsh words to the temple leaders - but he did it to his own people - not the foreign leaders, and those pawns of the system. His plan was love - his song was love, and love alone, love to the loveless shown. So, when Peter raised his sword and cut - Jesus healed. And ultimately when it came to fighting his own people, he laid it down.

And so we see Obie-One laying his life down, we hear Dumbledore telling Potter that "love" is the greatest force on the planet - I hear the liberal rantings (that come more from fear then actual morals) that war will only cause them to be greater enemies. And, I can see that...but it didn't happen with the Brits, or the Japanese, or the Germans - rather it brought, through serious destruction, peace that lead to friendships.

I remember the bumper sticker that says, "War never fixed anything: only facism, nazism, communism and slavery." And it must be agreed that wars bring about amazing change - but what aspect of war brings about change: love. One loves freedom, loves life, and the pursuit of happiness. And it is for love, of country or ideals, that people die. And yes- the terrorists may love their God Allah and his rules - but different types of love determine the winner, I believe.

There are also plenty of examples of violence-less love that changed things for people - Martin Luther King's peaceful marches, Gandhi's peaceful protests- and the countless inidividuals that have been influences more by teachers who loved them then teachers who forced them to behave.

And it brings me to my house falling down around me and how I have yelled and made threats and called lawyers and been so upset, and how this time I gave up- and took the trial to be just that - a trial...to be endured. And silently, I looked up at the holes in the ceilings and walls, and the accidently cut air duct, and the broken ac, and the torn up carpet and mat, and the dust littering our furniture for the third time, and I said, "So, if the air in not on, we will need a hotel." And as calmly as i made the request they said yes, and before we know it we are eating in this crazy neon pink lounge, and this big black man is singing "The Night Shift," with some Karaoke machine and Jennah and I are dancing the night away.

And, I guess what I am saying is this: there are many ways to get things done: and for my life that has often been by force- and I'm starting to question whether I want to go the force route anymore, even if it is justified. No, I'm not saying I won't discipline my kid, or force my will on them - but instead of "threatening the spoon," perhaps I will say instead, "will you please go take a nap," like I did this morning and see if it works just as well.

It is just a crack in the armor - that stands ready to charge into a battle - because I believe that all battles are not emotional and mental - some are flat out physical- but I am ready to try out more of the meek.

praying mantis - Friend - John 15:15 - Call me Amadeo

Praying Mantis thoughts for Thursday, August 25, 2005

Doing my blog thing from country inn suites in mesa cause our house sprung its third leak and the ac can not be on at the moment. Our ceiling upstairs and down is cut out and half our wall - carpet pulled up. We have lived in this house 4 months and been in the repari stage for about one month.

Anyways, drop in tonight - friend filling in so I can go to Coldplay. Phew.

praying mantis - Friend - John 15:15 - Call me Amadeo

Praying Mantis thoughts for Tuesday, August 23, 2005

Praying Mantis Portal Podcast for Sun the 28th

praying mantis - Friend - John 15:15 - Call me Amadeo

65 girls pregnant in school of 490 girls in Ohio.

praying mantis - Friend - John 15:15 - Call me Amadeo

Our Kids & Our Mirrors

Sometimes I don't like looking in the mirror. I don't like what I see usually. It is sad but it is true. I don't always like the way God made me. But sometimes, I don't like the way I made me. It was me who chose to eat to much, and it was me who chose to be too lazy and not comb my hair and it was me who forgot to wash my face good. If I am brutally honest - it is me who is the cause for my problems, not God.

So even though it hurts to look in the mirror it is probably good sometimes. Cause there might be a booger half hanging out of my nose, or a little chunk of blood from when I was picking at a zit...it is just good to make sure you haven't left a big peace of food in your teeth sometimes.

Looking at our kids can do the same thing. We throw up our hands, "Oh the impossibilities, frustrated and tired where do I go from here." - Reliant K. We see their shortcomings and often must admit we are the ones to blame. If our kids are selfish, it might be because we are. If our kids have short fuses and blow up easily, it might be because we do too. If our kids are promiscuous, we have to look at our own heart. It says the sins of the father will be inherited to future generations - so, sometimes it is best to look in the mirror and ask if it is us who has created this monster...or blessing.

Let's face it, we will never be perfect - and individuals are ultimately responsible for their own problems, but as parents we must seriously look ourselves in the mirror and evaluate whether what we are doing is helping to create youth that love the Lord and love others.

I have talked with other youth leaders and children's church leaders and we all agree, that our biggest problem is often more with parents of troubled teens then with the teens themselves. If we have a teen who has trouble behaving in church, we cringe when we think about dealing with the parents because they often will give us more grief than the kid if we deal with them. Apples don't fall far from the tree, the cliche goes...so, for all of us, it is probably important that we look in the mirror and say, "Lord make me look like you...and my kids too."

praying mantis - Friend - John 15:15 - Call me Amadeo

Ran 3 miles in 30 minutes last night. My milage seems to be going down, but my time is gettint better. I need to do more bike riding to mix it up. Love ya all.

praying mantis - Friend - John 15:15 - Call me Amadeo

Praying Mantis thoughts for Monday, August 22, 2005

Meditate on This

DO-NOT-LET- money matter merely
when your dreaming of the propositions,
they'll be plenty of oppposition
once you've released your system plan-

so first things first, look at the worst
and see just how you'd dare improve it,
see the needs, there all around
just like weeds tryin'ta confound ya

it's assessment, reinvestment,
spiritual leading and annointing,
it's the preaching and then releasin'
nation priests all up in the kingdom

find the person, plug them in there
after prayer and your discernment,
better than deffering it, or deterring it,
cauzya never had ya'self a plan.

meditation is a heart thing,
using your head sets us apart from,
all those animals on this earth now,
when were made in his image somehow-

were meant to hear and listen,
were meant to deal with all the tensions,
were meant to figure and to fathom
were meant to open up our eyes...

were part of a grand and greater picture,
were guided by the Spirit & the scriptures,
were given authority, and the power
for this day and for this hour.

so, meditate on what he's doing,
all around ya & in your heart yeah-
see the spirit as it's moving
-is it moving you to tears.

praying mantis - Friend - John 15:15 - Call me Amadeo

How's Your Filter?
(The Cracks are everywhere)

Knowing what your limitations are is a good thing.

Some people can not handle eating sweets because if they have one they want to have a million, so for them there sweet filter is broken. For others, their alcohol filter is broken so they can't have a drink or even be in the company of people who drink because their filter which allows them to stop once they start is broken. For others, they need to stop television all together because they are unable to turn off something that is useless for them, or they get addicted to it and watch it until all their time has been wasted. Some people have broken boundary filters - where they get used by everyone around them because they do not have the ability to tell others "no," or to say to them, "I need some time away from you because you are just driving me crazy...it is my problem, not yours, so forgive me and give me a little time." For some, they may not be able to read books like "Lord of the Rings," cause instantly they are trying to be too macho, or slicing their little sister with their plastic swords. For others, they can not read books like Harry Potter, cause instantly their broken filter causes them to start investigating witchcraft.

Being sensitive to other people's broken filters is a good thing.

Encouraging others to participate in activities where they filters are broken is to be a stumbling block to their life progress. The Bible warns us teachers of the young to be even more cautious of causing the young to stumble - because the punishment for doing so will be harsh. So when we speak to friends about "God making wine to make glad the hearts of men," and when we speak of Paul Admonishing Timothy to take a little wine to make his heart glad...and when we speak of freedom in Christ to have cable tv and the internet...we speak such things to only those who have filters in place that work because we are not the filter fixers...God is. And until God decides, and he might not...to fix their filters...then we would be best to just be quiet when we know that our brother and sister's filter doesn't work in a certain area. I do not believe it is our job to set them free of something they already wish they could be free of, but somehow can not seem to manage. Love our
weaker brothers and sisters - by encouraging them, praising them, gentle rebuking them while acknowledging your own broken areas...cause we are all pretty broken - the cracks are everywhere.

praying mantis - Friend - John 15:15 - Call me Amadeo

Praying Mantis thoughts for Saturday, August 20, 2005

My Soul of Old
sings again
the songs.

Since I've nothing new to say,
I'll talk about the old things,
the known things,
the beautiful things...
like having a second grader who
reads novels like, "The Hobbit,"
and about great yarns about good & evil
told by a woman who has not yet
pierced the veil,
yet she hears the mutterings beyond it.

I'll tell old mysteries to the kids
who gather to build ramps in the mud
at the drop in.

I will sing old hymns
and pretend I never even heard
of the vineyard,
I'll be back at the Baptist Potlucks,
waiting anxiously and hoping
all the home made chocolate chip ice cream
that the Kelley's made isn't gone.

I will sing,
"I'm so glad I came to Bible School,
I came to Bible School,
I came to Bible School."

I'll remember my first mission trip
where Jeremy and I dug the poop
out of the latrines with old dried
branches we found next to the dried
river bottom....
huh...
poop & river bottom.
that's funny.
and I'll tie that to older
memories of my first trip to India
and remember how we did it
without toilet paper.

I'll move back and forth
remembering the first apple
computer in 2nd grade and how it felt
nearly as exciting getting my
ibook last year.

I'll tell old stories about
a high schooler and junior higher
who seemed to get reaquainted with their parents,
just because of some shiny new red Honda 200s atc's
they bought to bring the family together.

I'll remember family as a safe place,
and coo over my kids,
telling them,
"I love you, I love you, I love you...
you will never know just how much
I love you,"
smashing my face into theirs
cause I need their touch,
I need your touch,
we need touch,
so bad.

I'll smell the leather on a quality Bible,
and open up to ephesians looking at
the smeared red letters
from when I tried, at 16, to teach
my first Bible Lesson
to a large youth group,
while incorporating the U2 lyrics,
I still haven't found what I've looking for.

Maybe, I'll reteach that lesson
to my youth today,
and recall my first big preaching,
and I'm sure the well's will rise up,
and I will become the baby I am
when the one thing I really love
is spoken from my soul,
oh my soul.

praying mantis - Friend - John 15:15 - Call me Amadeo

Ben's Version
of Finding God
in Harry Potter

Dementors - Creatures who suck the happiness out of your life and keep people prisoner. Ultimately servants of the Dark Lord. (AKA - Demons)

The Dark Lord - Head evil guy who controls Dementors and death eaters - and ultimately wants to rule but he can not because he has one fault - he can not access the greatest power of all which is love. Loves to work behind the scenes so that he is not seen. (AKA - Satan)

House Elves - Servants in our houses who aren't seen but are nonetheless always serving us humans. They want no other than to do their job, and do it faithfully (AKA - Angels)

Death Eaters - Humans in service and bondage to the Dark Lord - who move around in secrecy. They hate anyone who is not a pure-blood and serve only to bind people to thier ideology, and eliminate through death any who do not believe as they do.(AKA - Fundamentalists, Terrorists, religious zealouts as in Jesus's time.)

The Veil - A place beyond life, not so far from here, where we will one day be. (AKA - the place between life and death)

Magic - Spiritual Gifts and Miracles (AKA - Words of knowledge, prophesy, telportation- as in St Paul in the New Testament, healing, teaching, discernment, for entertainment - as in Jesus turned water into wine.)

wizards - People especially gifted with insight into the spiritual realm - and the battle in the heavenly realm.

Hogwart School -A discipleship program especially intended to train people in the Kingdom of God - the rule and reign of his kingdom in this present darkness.

The Mark - Harry POtter is marked from birth with a lighting bolt that came from the Dark Lord (AKA - Sin)

The Wand - A tool used in conjunction with the hand, the emotions (heart) and spoken words that is used as a weapon or defensive tool. (AKA - The Word of God, the sword of the spirit)

Remembral - A tool used to help people remember things (AKA - a PDA - a personal digital assistant)

Broomstick - A tool used for transportation (AKA - a bike or car)

Witches - Any person who uses spiritual truths to inact change. Good witches (AKA - Born again)use spiritual truth to act only in love to give spiritual knowledge or blessings. Bad witches (AKA people with knowledge of the Holy Spirit but still reject him) use spiritual manipulation for their own gain.

Muggles - Any one who does not believe in the spiritual realm (AKA - Secular humanists)

Giants - Large people who most of the world considers ignorant or uninformed - savage, unworthy of our time, trust or relationships (AKA - third world tribes)

Goblins - People in the business of money who give their life to that cause (AKA - money lovers)

Dumbledore - Head (God) of the school (AKA - Church), who preaches disipline, love, mercy, truth and who has no fear, only compassion for those who are hurting.

Harry Potter (Or Neville - for we have yet to know) - Young Man who must give up his life in order to overcome the Dark Lord. He is called the half blood prince (AKA - Jesus)

Sirius Black - Close friend of Harry Potter who dies - causing Harry great anguish (Lazarus)

Spiritual Truth 1 - Mercy Triumphs over judgement

Dumbledore has many instances in which he can kill his enemies - but instead he always chooses to resist the evil of killing someone. When Harry shows mercy where others want to kill, Dumbledore praises his restraint - suggestion that mercy now may one day cause that person to be indebted to you.

Spiritual Truth 2 - Even as young men and women we should begin training each other up in all spiritual knowledge and insight. When darkness has begun to grow and the good teachers have been eliminated, it is incumbant upon Harry to begin teaching his fellow students Defense Against the Dark Arts. He knows that spiritual battle will come and that they need to be taught how to stand firm.

Spiritual Truth 3 - Good & Evil are real

Many modern texts will try to persuade us that there is no such thing as good and evil only people will different truths. In these books, it is clear that evil is evil and that good is good, nothing less than a sharp divide. However, many times we see evil masquerading as good, characters who resemble good but are really imposters as in the "Fake Moody," or the rat, "Scabbers," or the servant "Kreacher."

Spiritual Truth 4 - We sow what we reap.

Harry's Dad teases and bullies his classmate Snape. Snape ends up being Harry's teacher and gives him lots of trouble. The sins of the earthly father are visited upon the son. (Interestingly enough Harry does not do those same things). Also, Sirius is cruel to his house servant and the house servant ends up bretaying him, ultimately leading to his death. Good wizards should have paid attention and cared for the giants - because since they did not, ultimately the enemy got to them to use them for his evil purposes.

praying mantis - Friend - John 15:15 - Call me Amadeo

Praying Mantis thoughts for Wednesday, August 17, 2005

Here is a great poem by the Regular Guy - Go check him out.

Ode to Joy

Every tear that slides down your cheek in anguish
Crushes my heart as if it were a ton of stones
Cast from a towering cliff.

Every harsh word that pierces your ear
Twists the sharpest sword through my ribs,
Ripping, tearing, breaking.

Every burden you collapse under
Binds me like rusty steel shackles
Clinking and stretched tight with useless struggling.

Every gale of life that leaves your soul
Dry, scorched, and cracking
Rises up in me helpless cries for justice.

When two become one, one becomes new.
When two become one, one becomes faithful.
When two become one, one becomes stronger.
Two become one.

~RG

praying mantis - Friend - John 15:15 - Call me Amadeo

When you love a phone...

I used to have a phone that I loved,
and one day it went missing.
and then the phone company sent me
a Nokia instead,
bad horrible wretched phone,
but it was free.

And I lived with it for a year or so,
when suddenly my old phone
returned from a lost space
in Hannah's car,
and now she is reprogrammed
and making me happy.

I love my Samsung. Oh yeah,
I love my Samsung.

praying mantis - Friend - John 15:15 - Call me Amadeo

Praying Mantis thoughts for Tuesday, August 16, 2005

The Gospel According to Bono

Michel Assayas, in his book Bono on Bono, asked a pointed questions - something about how Bono rationalized away the fact that the God of the old testament is so cruel and angry and how the God of the New Testament seems so different and loving and kind - Bono explains it kind of like this:

God of the Old Testament was like a father talking with his son, in a vertical relationship. The father needs to teach the son laws and actions and behavior and the son acts a bit crazy and gets disciplined - no one would forgive a father disciplinary behavior of his son - or a father protecting his children from evil doers all around them. But when the church grows up he starts to have a horizontal relationship with his kids - Jesus becomes one of us - he starts to relate to us like we do with our grown up children - he has grace instead of discipline for them - he can't, or better put...chooses not to discipline them like children - instead he lays his life down for them over and over - because that is who he has become a servant...or as it says in Jesus' own words: "I used to call you servant...now I call you friends."

This book really shows clearly his gospel and worldview which is probably the most admirable one I have seen to date - minus Mother Theresa - because of his focus on the gospel of the poor and the needy, the oppressed, and a overarching dependency on the efficacy of Jesus Christ.

Read this book: (But if you are a tad senditive to the occassional F-Bomb, maybe not)

praying mantis - Friend - John 15:15 - Call me Amadeo

Praying Mantis thoughts for Sunday, August 14, 2005

Sunday morning
and three shnooze alarms,
makes me feel a tad
like wearing my slippers to church,
and thankfully I'm in a vineyard
where most probably wouldn't care,
so I am teaching a story about
a very bad day,
one where a best friend betrays
his rabbi,
and the storm clouds are building thick over Phoenix,
and the ashes seem reluctant to rise,
and I want to exchange beauty for them,
but I am tired.
and lethargic after my day of rest yesterday,
loving my savior,
but thinking freedom is blessing,
and hanging out with my friends,
these skaters and loners,
these youth and braniacs
is much more preferrable to
labor-
and that whole grass being greener thing-
will be cured after I go worship for
a bit and get my priorities straightened out.

praying mantis - Friend - John 15:15 - Call me Amadeo

Praying Mantis thoughts for Wednesday, August 10, 2005

There is a joy
in the word "No,"
that may not
at first be appreciated.

Because sometimes no means
"less work for you,"

and sometimes it means,
"we need to talk."

and sometimes it means,
that father knows best.

and sometimes it hints at
growth that is just around the corner.

My pastor says,
"I will know that I am your pastor
when I see how you respond
when I say, 'no'"
and I am smiling
at the thought of what I want,
and what he said.

It is so beautiful not being the boss,
and so beautiful hearing "yes,"
and so wonderful to also hear, "no"
once the sting is gone.

praying mantis - Friend - John 15:15 - Call me Amadeo

Praying Mantis thoughts for Tuesday, August 09, 2005

Meet a Regular guy in M.R.

M.R.

praying mantis - Friend - John 15:15 - Call me Amadeo

Keith is on...so bless him as he blesses me.

Blindside Blessing

praying mantis - Friend - John 15:15 - Call me Amadeo

Ok, time to show off.

I ran 5 miles last night.

Now, time for modesty.

It took 70 minutes.

But, I think I will update you all as I start running so you can see my progress and be challenged and encouraged. So, bring it on. Who ran more miles in the last week? Here is the list of people doing the half marathan rock n roll thingy.

Ben
Obie
Jen
Hannah
Keith
Pattie
Vu
Amy
Eric
Robert
Angela

Anyone else? I suggest three runs - one each of the next three months.

First run last Saturday of August(8am): From church to Hannah's - 3.5 miles
Second run last Saturday of Septempber(8am):From Hannah's to Ben's - 6 miles
Third run last Saturday of October (8am): From Church to Ben's 9.5 miles

It can be a run and walk and then snack after. What do you all think?

praying mantis - Friend - John 15:15 - Call me Amadeo

Do you ever just feel like posting junk cause you need to vent - probably that is when the scriptural mandate to hold your tongue should come in. Let me try.

praying mantis - Friend - John 15:15 - Call me Amadeo

Fluffy White Post
(To make up for the harshesness of the others)

There is a bird
floating outside
my window
on a breeze that
is calling my name.

The cloud moves
3d in the background,
and I am reminded
by the setting sun
that rest is beautiful,
yes rest is beautiful.

praying mantis - Friend - John 15:15 - Call me Amadeo

I enjoy the banter of ideas-
forgive me as I try to figure it out myself,
I barely know what I am doing anyway-
and if I want to give staff
a year off to love their family,
forgive me for raising my voice
when you start to assign chores to them,
it is my opinion and my idea-
only that.

praying mantis - Friend - John 15:15 - Call me Amadeo

Heard this last night:

A few in our country are starting to cry out about the injustice of the war with 1800+ of our own dead,

but you don't hear those same people crying out about:

1. Drunk Drivers - kill over 15000 a year - but lawyers schmooze on the tv about how they can get out of it
2. Over 1,000,000 children killed by abortion every year.

priorities, priorities.

praying mantis - Friend - John 15:15 - Call me Amadeo

Praying Mantis thoughts for Saturday, August 06, 2005

phew. the house has been painted some. the back yard is less of a mess. We saw lots of craziness up at the cabin.

We saw a bat, whose radar apparently wasn't working, run into a truss on our back patio. It got knocked out and was shivering. You know bats are really hairy, cept on their leathery wings. They have little hamster ears and beady black eyes and a mouth that opens fairly wide. We thought it might be dying it was breathing heavy and jerking a bit. But after about 7 minutes or so, it looked up at me, started flying my way, and I'm thinking it that split second, I hope its radar is working now - a second before it hit me, it swerved off and flew away.

Later that day I watched a blue jay grab a finch and start thrashing it back and forward. then it carried it off into another tree and started eating it. Whoa.

We also watched a grey squirrel jump from tree to tree. The other birds we saw were a bunch of yellow canaries - that were somehow wild.

Hunter liked the walks in the neighborhood. He is our rotweiler/shitzu mix. heh heh. Beauty and the beast, I guess.

Finally, I have begun reading a series of books most in the Christian community think are not so good - but holy cow - this is the best series ever, since JR Tolkein. I am amazed at how well it deals with evil, struggles to choose between right and wrong and growing up.

praying mantis - Friend - John 15:15 - Call me Amadeo